• tourist: could you give us directions to Olive Garden?
  • new yorker: no, but i could give you directions to an actual Italian restaurant lol
  • tourist: oh you think you're clever???
  • new yorker: what
  • tourist: i'm going to meet my dying neice and she happens to love olive garden so her whole family is going to eat with her so she'll have a few moments of happiness
  • new yorker: oh... oh i'm so sor
  • tourist: no shut the fuck up you piece of shit. i'll find it myself
  • the tourist drives off and the new yorker is left to think about his life choices and his decision to be a giant condescending asshole